“I Don’t Understand Why Some People Hate”….Is It Them Or Is It Just Stigma?

Hello And Welcome Recovery Friends & New Visitors,

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Tamra Judge's photo.
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So I guess I just don’t get it? I happen to get an email from an anonymous person that simple read, “why would you waste your money on gambling in the first place? you made that choice, not society”….

OK,  Yes I did happen to make some poor choices in life, who doesn’t? And yes I did use gambling addiction for many reason’s, but it wasn’t like I woke one day and said to myself, “Gee, I think I will become a ‘Compulsive Addicted Gambler’, and destroy my life, waste money, and let gambling almost cost me my life, TWICE. Everyone is entitled to one’s opinion, but to be rude like that is not cool! To me, I smelled two things with that email, one ignorance, and two, STIGMA.
Why do people have to be mean, or just plain rude to get their point across?
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Most of us in recovery have come across a time or two where life, and something in our PAST comes back to bite us in the ASS, but for a person, another human being, take the time to send me a hateful email  just to make them feel better, because they haven’t a clue or understanding about any ADDICTION? it’s kind of ignorant of them. We know that STIGMA still exists, and most of the time I just chalk it up to the path I happened to go down, and that’s no one else’s fault but mine, and mine alone. I have taken the ‘Responsibility & Accountability’ for all did wrong while I was deep within my addictions with gambling and alcohol. What I don’t understand is the HATE others believe necessary to hurt others with words.
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It’s just another form of bullying someone. Do I hate this person back? Hell No, I learned a long time ago in my treatment, and in recovery that others ‘HATE’ really has nothing to do with me personally. So that’s on them. But when we talk about people not being kind to others, I know it opens a bunch of other can of worms. Let’s look at the definitions of both “Hate & Stigma” to see if there is anything similar between them,…and NO, I have not Googled the words before this blog post….LOL!
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“THE WORD HATE”

verb
verb: hate; 3rd person present: hates; past tense: hated; past participle: hated; gerund or present participle: hating
  1. 1.
    feel intense or passionate dislike for (someone).
    “the boys hate each other”
    synonyms: loathe, detest, despise, dislike, abhor, execrate; More

    be repelled by, be unable to bear/stand, find intolerable, recoil from, shrink from;
    formalabominate
    “they hate each other”
    antonyms: love
  2. used politely to express one’s regret or embarrassment at doing something.
    “I hate to bother you”
    synonyms: be sorry, be reluctant, be loath, be unwilling, be disinclined; More

    “I hate to bother you”
  3. “he hates flying”
noun
noun: hate
  1. 1.
    intense or passionate dislike.denoting hostile actions motivated by intense dislike or prejudice.

    modifier noun: hate
    “a hate campaign”

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“NOW THE WORD STIGMA”

noun
noun: stigma; plural noun: stigmata; plural noun: stigmas
  1. 1.
    a mark of disgrace associated with a particular circumstance, quality, or person.
    “the stigma of mental disorder”

    synonyms: shame, disgrace, dishonor, ignominy, opprobrium, humiliation, (bad) reputation More

    “the stigma of bankruptcy”
    antonyms: honor, credit
  2. (in Christian tradition) marks corresponding to those left on Jesus’ body by the Crucifixion, said to have been impressed by divine favor on the bodies of St. Francis of Assisi and others.
  3. 3.
    Medicine
    a visible sign or characteristic of a disease.
    • a mark or spot on the skin.

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OK,….. so there you go. The definition of both words.
Can we see anything similar to one another? Well either way, many of the meanings of each description of words used in the definitions of both are pretty similar like, Shame Disgrace, Dislike, Dishonor, and Regret…

It really hurts me that in today’s world, knowing what we know about many issues that surround many people with Stigma, like those of us in Recovery, Suffer Mental Illness, and those who endured Childhood Trauma & Abuse, that more people would have some understanding, or a little empathy. We are still human beings just like everyone else. Like these people think that it’s OK to tear others down when they feel or think we are not ‘Normal’ like them.
Well, sorry to burst their bubbles, but you’re not any more normal than we are if you keep feeding the need to hurt others just for the fun of it.
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Am I more sensitive than others due to my past pain & hurt? Maybe, but I think we all have a pretty good idea that there are still people in this world who go out of their way just to be racist, bigots, hurtful, mean, bully others, spew hate, and so on.
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I don’t know about you, but I don’t have room in my life for such people. To me, when others are like this I think to myself, “man, someone must have hurt them, or they are holding in some pain or trauma that happened to them, and the only way for them to cope in the world is to lash out at others.”  That just seems like a big load to carry around all your life don’t you all think?
I remember when I was a little like them myself. Most came from the pain and rage I had going on inside myself within my addiction. And again, THAT was on me. I have made most all my amends to those I hurt.
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Many don’t understand how shame, guilt, and not loving yourself can make a heart go black & cold. That’s what addiction does to you. Many who have not been touched by any addiction may not know about the ‘major mood swings’ that come along with addiction.
No excuses, just insights. And No, I’m not trying to judge ‘other people who ‘hate’ on others, as I have had enough hate thrown my way to know when it maybe an underlying problem for someone, or being done to someone for all the Wrong Reasons. I think my point is proven by all the needless ‘SUICIDES’ these past years of our teens taking their lives due to being bullied to death! It’s got to stop!
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Even many of the school shootings have been because someone may not be mentally stable, being bullied to the point of wanting to HURT BACK! No, it’s not how to fix the bullying problem, but a person, or  a teen can only endure so much bullying and hate to where they may just snap!  I think I see myself just a wee bit ahead of them, as At least I had the mental ‘Light-Bulb’ go above my head to tell me I needed to reach out and get my load I was carrying, a lot less heavy!….. “Awe The Good Life In Recovery.”
Well that’s my Ramblings for Today all….LOL.

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Happiness & Blessings To You All,
Catherine Townsend-Lyon
Author Of “Addicted To Dimes”
http://www.amazon.com/dp/0984478485

 

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“Nominations By Friends For The “Chicken Of The Sea Gratitude Awards”…

Hello Recovery Friends, Supporters, and Welcome Newbies,

 

A few weeks ago I posted a post regarding friends who had nominated me for “The Chicken Of The Sea Gratitude Awards” here on my blog. I also happen to get an “Anonymous Person” come leave me a comment I decided Not to Approve or Share on my blog as it was threatening and very mean!  Funny enough, a day or to after this person came by, I began to get cyber- bullied.  It was a “Nasty Ordeal” to say the least! They even got my blog suspended for 4 days until WordPress caught on to the BOGUS COMPLAINT and put my blog back up! My point? Why do people have to be mean?
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ANYWHO,….I want to clear any misconceptions of how I happened to be nominated. I was not NOTIFIED, or NOMINATED  BY “Chicken Of The Sea,”  it’s not how their award works, as they will do that later in the year as part of what they are doing to Honor those who make a difference in lives of others, and their communities. I was told by Email by 2 friends of mine, and my hubby!  YOU too can nominate a person, organization, anyone who “Pays it Forward” to others, or in their communities! For all the details you can visit their Website for all the info, terms, and details, which is listed below. Just “click on Make a Nomination.”   I could use your support in a nomination if you feel inclined…
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A NEW UPDATE ABOUT THE GRATITUDE AWARDS! May 19th, 2014!
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Chicken of the Sea - Mermaid Memo

Dear Author Catherine Lyon, ( Nominated)
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I’ve seen some beautiful sites touring the country on my Great American Gratitude Tour for the past two months. I’ve traveled over 11,000 miles to 22 cities in 10 states through the West and South. And I’ve helped Chicken of the Sea award 34 Great American Gratitude Awards to nonprofits and individuals paying it forward in their communities. I’m heading to the Midwest next for some baseball and great music festivals. To see when I’ll be in your neck of the woods, visit our website at www.chickenofthesea.com/100!

All the best,
Catalina
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Chicken of the Sea has paid it forward with over $250,000 in donations so far this year. We’re a quarter of the way to awarding $1,000,000 in awards to individuals and nonprofits around the country, and we want you to help us as we celebrate our 100th birthday! Nominate a nonprofit or individual doing good work in their community, telling us why they are worthy of an award. We’ll select 10 recipients nominated by our consumers and fans to receive $10,000 before the end of the year.

 

MAKE A NOMINATION
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I’ve been Nominated by several good friends and supporters! Come show support for all I to help others in Recovery with a Nom!! Thanks & God Bless!
Author, Catherine Lyon 🙂

Great American GratitudeAward Nominations | Chicken of …

chickenofthesea.com/100/gratitudeawards
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I happen to be informed by email BY TWO good friends of mine & my hubby, that they went and filled out the form and nominated me for this Special Award Given Later This Fall!
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So I posted a blog post to let others know I had been nominated. You can to go nominate me if you believe in my Recovery Message of HOPE & help those who suffer like I do with Mental illness, and are survivors of Childhood trauma, sponsoring others in recovery from addicted gambling, advocate where ever I can to share my story and message as anyone can recover from any addiction, and to “Shatter Stigma” around all these important issues, then you to can go and make a nomination.

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So, I was not nominated by the good folks at “Chicken If The Sea” YET,….I was by friends. And the post was meant for those who want to fill out the form and nominate me, they are Welcome to do so. So my friends asked that I “RE-SHARE” my post, and NOT to worry about some mean Anonymous Person trying to Bully or Sabotage all that I try to do to help others. So here is my Original Blog Post, and I’d appreciate your “Thoughts & Comments” on this Fabulous Event! I think all those friends who KNOW ME know I have a good heart and compassion for those in, or reaching out for recovery, and all in what I do 🙂 THANKS ALL! *Catherine*
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“I’m very excited to announce that I’ve been “Nominated” for “The Chicken Of The Sea Gratitude Award” by a wonderful friend! Now I need all my supporters, friends and fans to add to that with YOUR nominations.”
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For those of you who know me well, and know how much I “Advocate, Blog, Write, Inform, and try to Raise Awareness” about the important issues of those in recovery from addicted gambling, and all types of addictions, those who suffer with mental illness and disorders, and for those who been through childhood trauma and abuse as I have, I try to shatter the “Stigma” around these issues. I also coach and sponsor many, and share HOPE who reach out for recovery. I try to teach how to have a Healthy & Balanced Life too in recovery.
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So, if you believe in me, my message, and trying to “Pay It Forward,” I hope you’ll help me with a “Nomination” for this award!
Yes, they are giving 10 people a “Gratitude Prize & Award” of $10,000.00! And that could sure help me publish all my future BOOKS, Donate to my favorite recovery & mental health support sites and tithe. It’s simple to do…
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Just Visit The Website & Nomination Page, and fill out the form & submit! It’s that easy…..
*SEE BELOW for extra info you’ll need for the form*
http://chickenofthesea.com/100/gratitude-awards/ Here is a little more info!

Nominate a Deserving Friend for a $10,000 Gratitude Award!
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Chicken of the Sea is looking back by paying it forward to celebrate our 100th birthday. To thank Americans for making our products a mealtime staple, we are investing $1 million in up to 100 public service-minded individuals and nonprofits, empowering them to continue their inspiring community work across America. And we’re selecting 10 of those awards from among groups and individuals nominated by you… So Come Make a nomination now!
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How to Participate

Chicken of the Sea believes in the positive ripple effect of good deeds. There are so many individuals and non‑profits that make America a better place. Tell us who you think deserves a $10,000 Gratitude Award. Here’s how:

1.) Nominate a friend or group that is currently doing good work in their community, and tell us why you believe they are worthy of an award.
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2.) We’ll start announcing the recipients we’ve selected on our Great American Gratitude Tour, starting in early October, 2014.
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3.) **As part of our 2014 Centennial Celebration of $1,000,000 in Gratitude Awards, we’ll select 10 Gratitude Award recipients nominated by their friends, consumers and fans to receive $10,000. Deadline for entries is September 1, 2014 at 11:59:59 PM PT***
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“Nominee name “Catherine Lyon” and my “email” kitcatlyon@yahoo.com  my phn# ( 602 ) 363-6977  and My Website: https://betfreerecoverynow.wordpress.com
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AND….YOU HAVE TO LIVE IN THE USA..
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*Lastly, A special message that touched my heart by another good friend & awesome writer & author*
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Great American Gratitude Awards’ only allows US citizens to vote in their recent contest. Can’t post my reason for nominating Catherine anywhere else, at least that I can find, so I shall post it here. I hope those of you in the States who know Catherine will hop on board and cast your vote for this extremely deserving person.
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My reason for nominating her:
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Since coming to know Catherine Lyon through both of our writing ventures, and listening to audio interviews as well as reading about her difficult journey, I feel she has more than paid her dues with respect to again finding, and gaining back her own self-respect, and not only that, but helping others who have suffered the same ailment and addiction that she herself has had to battle, and continues her fight to maintain. She has been open and honest about her illness, both experienced and suffered what it can do to one’s life and self-esteem, suffered the embarrassment and humiliation of her addiction, and regardless of that continues to strive in the area of helping others recognize their problem, and how to cope with it. This would not be any easy task, for each day is an uphill climb for those who battle the illness of gambling addiction, so I would wholeheartedly nominate Catherine Lyon for this award of which I feel she is truly deserving of.
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– author Rusty Blackwood
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Rusty Blackwood ~~ Please go VISIT her On her wonderful Website!!

RustyBlackwood | Author | Romance Novels | Home

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HAVE A FABULOUS WEEK FRIENDS!
BLESSINGS ALL,
AUTHOR, CATHERINE TOWNSEND-LYON