Accept Me . . . Is It To Much To Ask For? “Flash Back Recovery Post Day!” Happy Thanksgiving All :)


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My Mental/Emotional Disorders, Recovery, or Childhood sex abuse & trauma survivor is not my label . . .

So please, don’t put me into a box labeled mental case or freak. And most definitely don’t treat me like I am different from others. Don’t set me into a category at all. I’m not a thing, I am human being. Don’t you see me? I am of flesh and blood like you.
I have feelings, a heart and a soul. I have a spirit no longer broken, not a victim of my disabilities. I am and will be a “work in progress” for a lifetime.

So don’t talk about my mental illness as if I’m not standing right in front of you. Learn to have more understanding, be educated about addictions, the cycle, recovery, and be informed not judge.

Don’t look through me, look at me. Have some compassion for those who battle with these issue’s, who have the courage to do so, and to take back their lives from addiction, and learning themselves to handle and face daily mental illness challenges, and overcome trauma and addictions.
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“Kindness is a Choice”, . . . as it is written in our Gospel/Bible to love one another no matter the faults or sins. To help one another. That includes those of us who may have taken a wrong detour in life for part of our journey, of God’s plan for us. I am human just like you. Life is a lifetime of choices. Yes, some may not make the right ones at times, but who asks this if it’s right or wrong? Is it our world and society we live in who asks? Is it our creator who lets us know when our choices are not correct, not you or someone else need not judge me, as it is not your job to do so, it is God’s.

I want my voice be heard among the roof tops that I am here, I am real and not my faults or wrong choices. I will be loud. I am not a person to be stigmatized by words, your words, harsh and negative from your mouths. No, I have feelings, I can hurt just like you. I am not my disease, my disorders, my situation, tragic as it has been in the past. I am of love and kindness. Of caring and sharing hope.

Am I Perfect? No, nor will I ever be.


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But I do know now the love and compassion I have for others is very real. You may not hear it, but you will feel it.
I am not my past, I am my future. I am and feel destined for great things, some of which have already come into my life. I live each day in this one moment in time.

Tomorrow will be here soon enough. Yes, I may live my life in recovery with mental disabilities and past trauma, but that is what I also have overcome.

No I may not be normal, hell normal is over rated, but at least I am happy about who I have become in recovery! No one person, place, or thing can steal my joy, my sparkle, nor my life that I have reconstructed from ash and devastation.

So please, accept me for WHO I AM TODAY, not my disease, my illness, wrong choices, or my past.

Is This To Much to ASK? . . . .

HAPPY THANKSGIVING ALL!
Author, Catherine Townsend-Lyon

Product Details
(click book to buy)

Recovery Sharing and Engaging With Others About My Life & My Book. . .

Hello Recovery Friends, Supporters, and Welcome New Visitors,


“Always know your not less than, you worth more than”. . .

Living ones life in recovery means different things to different recovery people. Those of us who accept and surrender come from all walks of life, and we come from addictions from many different paths. I always say, “we all have a story to tell, and that story can be a powerful tool to help others in their recovery.”

As many of my friends who know me well, they know that besides advocating and sharing my personal recovery journey, I book promote for some fine authors to make a living. Many of my clients turn into fantastic friends. They support my life in recovery, and my current published book of my story of addiction and much more! They trust that I put the effort into promoting their books as I do into advocating for recovery. But I do always share who I am in recovery as I do as a published author. WHY?

Because I’m honest, accountable, and not feeling “less than” in life. Most new friends I meet as book promo clients buy and read my book, and learn exactly where I’ve been, and who I am today. What I had to work through and overcome. I never let my past define the person I am today. That is why I wanted to share this interaction that I had with a new author/book promoting client. It really shows how passionate I am about my life in recovery, and shows just how serious and honest people can be about their views of people in recovery. My sharing is meant to continue my fight of shattering STIGMA around those of us who choose to live in recovery from a very hush, hush addiction of “Compulsive Addicted Gambling, Mental Health, and Childhood Trauma & Abuse.” . . .


“No More Shame” . . .

My Interaction with Author, Jeanne Marie Peters by email:

Jeanne: Dear Catherine,
I’ve read one-half of your story and it has well-defined for me what the phrase “dysfunctional family” means. I’m so glad you have this wonderful husband and I hope the second half of your story will record the sunshine hours of your life. So far my summation is: All the while the drama of mortal existence takes front stage, but in the quiet background pure affection is winning its way, until the whole lump of human life is leavened, and the sweet odor of gentleness perfumes the air.

Like you, my younger years did not contain ‘many acknowledgements of worth,’ and I treasure the few such as hearing my Aunt Sarah say, “Isn’t Jeanne a good little girl?” and her brother, my grandfather, responding, “Yes, she’s as good as gold.”  And one of the five I ever heard from my dear mother, “You are always polite to every one; politeness is not just a social thing; it’s comes from the very fiber of your being.” But at the same time you having rage inside.”  I mention these, because it reminds me of the power of a few kind words, as I sort through your own torturous journey to your divine precious being.

Relatives who are of the Mormon faith have written my grandfather, Fred Mansfield Law, out of family history because he gambled. We’re all working something out in our lives. “Charity covereth a multitude of sins,” says the Bible. Kindly allow me to share one of grandfather’s poems. . .

Easy Valley
There’s a little spot out West
Where you can be at rest,
It’s the place that I like best: Easy Valley

Where there’s music in the air
And the birds recite a prayer,
For all that’s lovely there: in Easy Valley

It has gold along its streams
And miners in their dreams,
Know how long it seems: they’ll tarry.

Many years I’ve been away,
Now I’m going back to stay.
I’ll soon be on my way: to Easy Valley

Gee, won’t it seem to grand
Just to take my sweetheart’s hand,
The one who understands: in Easy Valley

And by a little cottage gate,
There my darling waits,
Near the River Applegate: in Easy Valley

And by a little cottage gate,
There my darling waits,
Near the River Applegate: in Easy Valley

Where there’s music in the air
And the birds recite a prayer,
For all that’s lovely there: in Easy Valley

Many years I’ve been away,
Now I’m going back to stay.
I’ll soon be on my way: to Easy Valley
God Bless,
Jeanne

Now this poem Jeanne shared with me touched my heart. Even though she was only half through my book, she understood my style of writing, and also understood the way I wrote and shared my experiences to not sound to readers like, denial, excuses, or as a victim. It is very difficult to do when writing about addiction and recovery. Especially to those readers who may not have been touched by addiction. So here is what I replied and shared back to Jeanne of my feelings. . . .

Catherine:
I’m glad you got my book ok. This poem is beautiful, and I thank you for sharing it with me. I’m also going to share it in a new recovery blog post this week too! You are becoming more like a wonderful 2nd mama to me with your wonderful recovery encouragement and support, as I didn’t get to much of that from my mom until later in life, before her passing in 2003.

I really appreciate that about you. You have such an open heart and spirit about you. It’s like a magnet. . .;-).  And what you’re doing with and for Catherine is a blessing. (Her next book co-authored with her friend). My next book is a little follow-up of where Tom, my hubby, and I are now, what I’ve been up to since my book published, and the rest is about how others can reach that all elusive first year in recovery. When I’m not promoting for clients, I’m keeping my recovery a main priority now that I just celebrated my 8th year in recover. I’m keeping to what God has given me, a life long purpose to help others in recovery from the destructive addiction of Compulsive Addicted Gambling.

And to continue my advocacy of raising awareness, help educate and inform the public of the dangers of now expansions of Indian Casinos and State Lotteries. This expansion is hurting those of us trying to stay in recovery when gambling is so accessible all around us. I harbor NO ill will towards those who can gamble for the fun and entertainment purpose, nor do I think gambling should be banned. I just want the public to know there are thousands of us out here who can not. And with expansion comes some negative impacts on our local communities. That’s it in a nutshell.

So sharing my story through my book was the only way I knew I could achieve this God Given Purpose.  And I believe that others, if given the chance can also turn their lives around and away from addictions with the right help and support. When we let our Higher Creator inside our Heart, we in Recovery are Unstoppable!

Many Blessings Your Way,
Catherine. . .

So that was my reply to Jeanne. I feel it’s important to share our true feelings. WHY?
Because within our addictions we become selfish, and so numb from the disease that we lose that ability to feel and think properly. No, I’m not blaming the addiction or disease for the poor choices I had made, I’m saying that we are in no healthy, or clear minded position to make those healthy choices in life when we have a head full of diseased thinking, bad habits and behaviors we have picked up within addiction. Addiction invades every part of you. As we know many of our thoughts and our choices come from feelings to begin with, so if we don’t feel any of the pain or devastation ourselves, and to those around us, we are barely of sound mind to make healthy life choices.

But, as I told Jeanne in my reply, if we fight like hell to reclaim our lives from addiction, and with the right help and support, we can recover and reclaim our lives back from any addiction!

Many Blessings and Happiness Recovery Friends!
Catherine Townsend-Lyon, Author & Recovery Advocate