I was reviewing an upcoming event I saw on Facebook that will be taking place here where I live in Arizona. Since I battle challenges of mental health, I am going to soon share it here on my website as it pertains to raising Mental Health Awareness through the event being held in Mesa, AZ late this month.
But as I read and research all the information? I came across an article about one of the musical guests who will be performing at the event. As read and dug deeper about the guest, Alex Boye’ who happens to be an exceptional vocalist and a singer who happens to Africanize Pop songs. I love his music as he is a very talented singer after being founded on “America’s Got Talent” years back.
Long story short, his wife is white, while Alex is black born in London, England and they have eight biracial healthy thriving children… But about 10 years ago Alex’s wife, Julie received an anonymous letter from someone that IS filled with HATE, trash talk, and heartbreak, along with being an ignorant racist.
Since February is “Black History Month,” I felt it fitting to share this letter because I applaud her answer to the person who is anonymous and actually mailed it to her home address, which is disturbing in itself. It just touched me to my core while reading HER answer in this article.
I CHEERED as I read her letter, But sadly, it also proves that we have NOT come far enough out of people still spewing hateful racist remarks and their ideology thinking of today. Sad, but true…
(Photo Courtesy of Julie Boye’)
PERSPECTIVE RACE IN AMERICA OPINION
Perspective: What I’ve been wanting to say to the anonymous hater
My husband is Black. Our eight children are biracial. We love each other even when we are confronted by haters… By Julie Boyé Feb 202
Editor’s note: Ten years ago, the author of this essay, Julie Boyé, received an anonymous letter through the mail. The letter was riddled with expletives and racial slurs directed at Julie Boyé, who is married to British-American singer Alex Boyé, and her family. The letter states, in part, that Julie is a “disgrace to the rest of us white people,” because Julie is white and Alex is Black. The letter was signed “Concerned Parents.” In this essay, Julie Boyé is publicly responding to the letter for the first time.
Dear “Concerned Parents,”
I’ve wanted to respond to your letter for a long time now. But I don’t want you to think that you’ve been at the forefront of my mind. Actually, you’ve been benched in the back. But every so often, I think about the day I got your letter, and I’m reminded that people like you actually do exist, which I’ll never be able to comprehend.
It was 10 years ago when I received your stamped envelope in my mailbox. The handwriting looked like a kindergartener’s penmanship, complete with backward R’s and a combination of upper and lowercase letters. You made the effort to make the handwriting unrecognizable, which I found strange.
“Who in Pennsylvania knows where I live?” I wondered.
I thought maybe it was fan mail of some kind. Sometimes people write to thank me for letting my husband, Alex Boyé, take time away from our family to perform a concert or speak. I thought it might be something like that.
It was not that.
It was a vile diatribe so profoundly disturbing that it reminded me of those described in Latter-day Saint scripture as “a wild and a hardened and a ferocious people.” Except you sat behind a computer like a coward, typed a letter berating my amazing, God-given family, got in your car, paid for a stamp, and mailed your deranged rant anonymously. At least villains of old had the courage to show their faces.
You seemed to find pleasure in name-calling. You used the N-word repeatedly. You called my family “shameless ingrates” and “mongrels.” Multiple times, you called me a prostitute. I’ve come to realize that your letter is really about you, and not about me. It’s a reflection of just how hurt you must be to write a letter like this.
Because hurt people hurt people.
Still, it’s astounding the way you choose to speak. You said you would disown your children if they were romantically involved with a person of another race, and that you’ve been telling them that since they were small. You said you would rather your kids be with a white father who abused them than with a Black father who did not.
But here’s the kicker: There is hope for your kids, and maybe for you, too. Your kids, I believe, will likely be better than you. They may well be pioneers of peace in your family, not the carriers of repugnant racist beliefs passed down from an ignorant parent.
Like my own husband, who was a victim of abuse, they may be the ones who can break the link to end a destructive chain within a family’s line. Who knows, maybe your children could be the means to open your own eyes and lead you to the love that comes on the other side of blind bigotry.
“In Loving v. Virginia, decided on June 12, 1967, the U.S. Supreme Court unanimously struck down Virginia’s law prohibiting interracial marriages as a violation of the Fourteenth Amendment. The appellants, Richard and Mildred Loving, of Caroline County, had married in Washington, D.C., in June 1958 and then returned to Virginia, where they were arrested. After pleading guilty, they were forced to leave the state. The American Civil Liberties Union (ACLU) filed motions and appeals on their behalf beginning in 1963, and after the Virginia Supreme Court of Appeals ruled against the Lovings in 1966, the U.S. Supreme Court heard their arguments.
The case came after nearly 300 years of legislation in Virginia regulating interracial marriage and carefully defining which citizens could legally claim to be white. Two U.S. Supreme Court cases, Pace v. Alabama (1883) and Maynard v. Hill (1888), upheld the constitutionality of such laws. In 1924, the Act to Preserve Racial Integrity banned interracial marriage in Virginia while defining a white person as someone who had no discernible nonwhite ancestry. It was this law that the U.S. Supreme Court ruling said denied Virginians’ “fundamental freedom” to marry. Loving v. Virginia is a landmark case, both in the history of race relations in the United States and in the ongoing political and cultural dispute over the proper definition of marriage.“
It’s been almost 55 years since the decision in Loving v. Virginia, the Supreme Court case that invalidated laws banning interracial marriage. We still have a long way to go to get rid of racism in our society, but as CBS News reported, “Nowadays, you can hardly open a magazine or turn on the TV without seeing an interracial couple.” Nearly 1 in 5 marriages in the U.S. involve people of different ethnicities, nearly twice the number from just two decades ago.
In other words, ironically, you’re the aberration, not me.
February is Black History Month, and at this time each year, I’m always reminded of the heroic accomplishments of our Black brothers and sisters. The insulting names, the abuse, and the racist ladders they had to climb give me perspective on just how minuscule my own experience with racism has been.
As Alex likes to say, “It’s Black History Month every month for me. I’m still Black in March, April, May, and June.”
The scriptures teach us to turn the other cheek, but sometimes we need a little spinal adjustment and pop of the neck to help us combat the punches.
So to that end, I declare to you, “Concerned Parents”:
We, The Boyés are a thriving family of 10 in a world that otherwise criticizes us for our size. I have eight strong and resilient kids who love one another and help each other and try to be like Jesus. I have a husband who lifts me up and stands behind me when cowards like you come swingin’ (and miss). He bears me up in the moments I lose my confidence to trolls who delight in the shedding of emotional blood continually.
So thank you very much for your concern, but it’s misplaced, much like your values.
The Boyés are doing just fine.
How are your kids?
Visit Alex’s website to sample his music as a multicultural Vocalist at: https://alexboye.com/…
His Ukraine Tribute and Charity Fund Song: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c6TZD1jfMkc
Julie Boyé and her husband, Alex, live in Sandy, Utah, with their eight kids and goldendoodle.